Did I just have a panic attack?

03/20/22-My husband arrived to help pack my things to head home. We talked on the phone (hands-free) nearly the entire 2 hours and 45-minute ride home. I shared what my week was like and what I have learned in neural retraining. I have more insight than I did before. I think many with MCAS do not realize how exhausting and time consuming it becomes to manage the environment or worry about what smell that will cause a reaction is around the corner; it just happens. It becomes your new normal; a dysfunctional normal. I did not realize how much real estate the sensory of smell had taken up in my brain. With MCAS your sense of smell becomes distorted and sometimes it is difficult to recognize what you are smelling and if it is a threat or not. I experienced this after getting home that night. There are still issues in our home since the fire that we are working to solve, but we are waiting on professional’s schedules so it is not happening as quickly as we would like. When I walked in the door, I kept running into different smells throughout the house, intense chemical smell, dead body, something I do not know, what is that smell?? Every where I turned, were unfamiliar smells. Were they threats? I need to get away!!! My husband was apparently talking to me, and I didn’t even hear him. He thought I was angry because the kitchen was a mess and there was some spoiled kale in the refrigerator (this is what my nose interpreted as dead body smell). I went outside to get some fresh air and use my inhaler, respiratory essential oils, and take a rapid-acting antihistamine. My skin was burning, and a rash was starting along w coughing and wheezing. I do not want to give epi. Outside, someone had a bomb fire, which was giving me a headache. UGH! Where do I go?? Is anywhere safe for me to breathe?!?!  I was in tears and went to my room and turned on one of our air cleaners and eventually fell asleep after the itching subsided. I think I had my first panic attack. I could not talk to my husband until morning and explain what was happening. He didn’t even realize what was happening as I was inside panicking vs. showing external signs. He was understanding once I explained. In the morning I was able to distinguish what some of the things I was smelling were: off gassing area rugs in our living room, dining room and my office; fragrance from the back of the hallway; kitchen smelled fine in the morning because my husband got rid of the Kale and cleaned up the kitchen. This is an example of how distorted and sensitive smell can become. Today will be better.